Yep, as the title line says, a new trailer has come out for the upcoming remake of Total Recall. Ordinarily, this wouldn’t be that big a deal, except that this one shows how they are including a key part from the old movie: the three-breasted hooker! It seems that she will be featured in this movie as well, which geeks everywhere were sure to be asking. It goes without saying that anyone who saw the original remembers that woman. But for true sci-fi geeks and pubescent boys, she was right up there with Princess Leia in the bikini, inspiring more than her share of nerdgasms!

And since the movie is getting nearer, I am wondering if I am going to bother to see it. Sure, I’m curious and kind of intrigued by the reboot of a movie I appreciated as an adolescent, but is it worth it? Given the price of tickets these days (punitive!), I had to make a list of reasons for and against. First up…

Reasons to see this movie:

• It looks pretty cool. If nothing else, it would be interesting to see what the updated special effects amount to. The old movie contained many instances of animatronics that didn’t look too realistic. Personally, I’d like to see if the CGI looks better.
• Clearly, the technology has been updated, and includes flying cars, robot policemen and cooler weapons.
• The trailers seem to indicate an apparent loyalty to the old storyline, even if it’s not a scene for scene remake. This is good seeing as how the plot was the original movie’s biggest strength, in my opinion.

Okay, not bad, not bad. But if I comb through these points, I notice that curiosity and the allure of eye candy – special effects, not Jessica Biel or Beckinsale! – are pretty much the only reason. I would like to see what they do with the storyline, but it’s not like there are going to be any surprises.

Reasons to wait for the DVD:

• If the movie IS loyal to the original, then couldn’t it just as easily be argued that it’s not worth the theater price?
• The original was based on a PKD short story named “We Can Remember It for You Wholesale”, which the screen writers altered and expanded upon greatly. So the updated version isn’t really a re-imagining of a classic sci-fi story, but of a popular movie.
• I get the feeling the only reason they made this movie is because Hollywood producers have gotten incredibly lazy and would rather pull a Lucas (aka. redoing an old movie with updated special effects) than make anything new.

Huh… perfectly good counter-points. If I did see this movie, it wouldn’t out of loyalty to Philip K. Dick, but rather than some dudes who worked for the Hollywood machine. And what the hell have they done for me? Okay, they did give me Blade Runner, 2001, the Star Wars trilogy, the Back to the Future trilogy, Alien, Aliens, Terminator 1 and 2, Serenity, and the Matrix… but what have they done for me LATELY?

Well, that’s my appraisal of it, at any rate. Luckily, I’ve been doing some reading today that says there are a whole slew of movies coming out in 2012 that are not remakes, reboots, or re-imaginings. And some of these are well overdue, as far as fans of classic science fiction are concerned. Of that, more later. In the meantime, check out the updated trailer. Note the absence of actual boobs…